How to Make Crack Cocaine
Many people are checking online for how to make crack cocaine.
This is very understandable since many crack-heads don't want
to deal with cranky and unreliable dealers or that whole supply
and demand thing.
So, if you want to know definitively how to make crack cocaine
then I will show you how. The three basic ingredients you'll need
to get your buzz going are Cocoa Puffs, Diet Sprite and Mentos.
Now, stay with me here. I feel you drifting off and ready to hit
that Back button. Don't do it. Really, don't do it.
Now, many people believe that cocaine comes from the Cocoa leaves
- wrong! It does not. This is an urban myth. Remember in the early
1900's when Coca Cola had a small amount of cocaine in it to stimulate
its drinkers into buying more Coke?
Well who do you think that the Coca Cola makers bought their
cocaine from? That is right my friend, the makers of Cocoa Puffs,
General Mills. And, today, if you take a box of Cocoa Puffs to
a CSI crime lab (or a filming of a TV episode) you'll also find
more than trace amounts of cocaine in Cocoa Puffs.
Okay, so you have your three ingredients. And, you still want
to know how to make crack cocaine. The speediest and most optimal
way to do it is to first fill your mouth with as many Cocoa Puffs
as you can fit in. Add two Mentos and fill the rest with Diet
And, watch the chemical reaction. You'll be foaming at the mouth
like a rabid dog on steroids.
Your friends will be thinking that you're having a grand mal
epileptic seizure of epic proportions. And, you will be getting
a mighty buzz at the same time. In fact, with any luck, you'll
see a hallucination of that wacky bird flying around you saying
"I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs."
And you will be Cuckoo on crack cocaine as this is how to make
it, shake it and fake it with the best of them.
Disclaimer: Don't try this at home. Certain exclusions
and warranties apply. See you doctor and law enforcement for details.