How Pilgrim is a basic "how-to" do-it-yourself (DIY) website with a twist. There are thousands of how-to websites on the Internet right now giving you advice on this and that. Some of the how-to advice is good while other advice is trash.

On this site, you can be assured that all answers to your important questions are indeed trash. This ask an expert site doesn't have one serious answer on this website. In fact, How Pilgrim mocks and satirizes other how-to and ask an expert sites that have the gall and arrogance to think they know better than you do.

For instance, the editor of How Pilgrim is a big know-it-all and I basically irritate people with my so-called wisdom. In fact, over the years I have discovered that a lot of my wisdom is just plain wrong.

So, now I want to share these wrong, uninformed, ill-advised and downright irritating answers to your honest questions. The hope is that by giving you the wrong answer to your question, albeit in a funny and humorous manner, you can cross this off your list and go on to find the right answer. In other words, ask a real expert for the DIY, FYI or WTF answer.

Nothing and let me repeat nothing (I like to repeat myself as a know-it-all) on this website is to be taken seriously. Conversely, I recommend that you follow none of my recommendations and come up with your own solutions. WTF, you say?

The inspiration for How Pilgrim is simple. As a child my friends and I went around saying this phrase to each other. At that time, it actually meant "Hi Pilgrim". But as time ran on and imaginations ran wild it made me think of when the Pilgrims bought their first Plymouth at The Rock, Massachusetts.

The Indians were curious about the new settlers who would one day, take their land, push them onto reservations and make them turn to alcohol addictions for consolation (at this point "Why Pilgrim" would be the appropriate phrase).

But, before this the Indians were curious about the white man and asked many questions. The words "how Pilgrim" must have been uttered many times in the context of "how you do this or how you do that" such as "how do you teach your English bulldog to rollover" or "how do I put brass buckles on my moccasins?"

So, How Pilgrim is basically set up where you are the Indian asking me the Pilgrim the answer to a specific question. I give you the world's worst answer and we go from there. I pretend to be an authority on anything and everything under the sun and you go forward snickering behind my back at my stupidity. I tell you FYI that you can DIY and you say WTF.

Anyway, that is how this is supposed to work. If you find some of the information on this website actually helpful, then let me know and I will remove it immediately. This is not a place for real and helpful answers. This is a place for misinformation and hopefully a little fun.